Short answer
Smaller than you think. Look for the smallest size in a range, with a tapered tip, a narrow neck and a wide flared base. A graduated set lets you move up slowly over several sessions or weeks. If a finger feels comfortable, a plug of a similar width is a sensible place to start.
Read the full guideAnal Play for Beginners: Comfort, Safety and First ToysAnal play for beginners, made simple: how to prepare, why lube and flared bases matter, what to expect the first time, and the best first toys to try. Updated November 9, 2026 · All questions
